The "Bestest" Birthday Ever
by Bill Sanders - October 29, 2002
First published in 10/30/2002 LYAO Email
Chris’s (my GF's) Birthday was yesterday (10/28), and I think I gave her a present that surprised her more than she thought she could be. We are now engaged. She said, now she can call me her "fiancée" instead of "boyfriend". Let me tell you about it. This story’s a little long, but I think the setup is almost as much fun as the payoff.
About three weeks ago, one of the jewelers in Lebanon started an "inventory reduction sale". I told Chris we should go, so she could pick out a birthday present, if she wanted to. My ulterior motive, at this point, was to find out what type of rings she was interested in. Well, we went and spent some time there, looking at all the diamond rings (not engagement, but N-I-C-E). I kept joking that she had expensive tastes, and, if she was going to get one of the rings she was looking at, that it was not only going to be her birthday present, but Christmas, and maybe next year’s birthday presents, too. She said she didn’t care. Anyway, she picked one out, and we put it in layaway.
While we were there, I had her look at some of the engagement
rings and wedding sets, because I "knew" this was the type
of ring she wanted. She, of course, prevaricated, and said,
"No… No", because we had never really talked about this. (My
son asked her when we were going to get married, and she
told him to ask me. This was a couple of months ago. Hell,
even my ex asked when I was going to marry her in front of
her!
) Of course, most of the rings they had in the case
fit her, and she "picked out" a couple, "just for fun". We
left, and the jeweler put them back in the case.
A day or so later, she went to visit her kids in the Evansville area, and I went back to the jeweler’s to get the birthday ring, and the surprise. We found one of the ones she had picked out that night – the diamond "stands up" – and I bought it. I told the jeweler that I only wanted one box, that while Chris knew about the one ring for her birthday, she had no idea about the other. He said, "Nice surprise."
I hid them on the top shelf of our floor-to-ceiling shelving unit, behind a speaker. I knew she probably wouldn’t find it there, unless she or Christopher decided to rearrange the shelves, and I didn’t think that would be the case (it wasn’t). It stayed there until Sunday, when Christopher was at his mother’s, and Chris was visiting her kids, again. (She had said something on Friday about us needing to go to the jeweler’s to get the ring out of layaway. I told her I could do it on Sunday, and she reminded me they were closed on Sunday. I told her not to worry about it… I had already gotten it. – Whew!) I got it down, and tried to figure out how I was going to do what I wanted. Originally, I was just going to put the rings together, and, when she opened the box, she’d see them both. But, the thing wouldn’t hold both rings very well, and I didn’t want to tear up the box.
I knew I was going to put a piece of tape, or something that said, "Will you?", or "Will you marry me?" on the engagement ring, so I went ahead and put a small piece of paper tape around it, taping it to itself, and trimmed it so it wouldn’t be sticky. I wrote, "Over ->" on one side, and "Will you marry me?" on the other. I folded the tape so the "Over" side was out, and took a full-size (1") piece and taped the ring inside the top of the box. Amazingly, the paper tape was almost the same color as the box lining, so it was hard to see, unless you looked directly into the top, and the tape almost completely covered the ring. I put another "ribbon" of tape on the other ring with "Happy Birthday" and "over ->" on one side, and "Under the Lid" on the other. With my big fingers, the sliver of tape, and the marker, it was a little difficult to read, but, hey… I thought the meaning was clear! I folded that one so the "Happy Birthday"/"over->" side was out, and put it in the ring-holder slot in the box. When you looked at it, you could barely see the other because of the tape. I found some "Happy Birthday" wrapping paper, and wrapped the box, which I then left on my desk.
Christopher came home, saw the box, and said, "Oh… I know
what is." I kept assuring him that it was just a birthday
ring she knew all about, but he kept pushing, and joking (he
says) saying that he knew that it was a diamond ring. I told
him that yes it was… a diamond birthday present ring. God, I
wanted to strangle him!
Chris came home, and he shut up
for a while.
I was chatting on-line, later, with Dad, and he told me that they had planned to take us out for Chris’ birthday, in Lafayette, wherever she wanted. She had said a couple of days earlier that we should go to Red Lobster sometime, so I asked if that was ok. Dad said, "If that’s what she wants, that’s great for me!" So, last night, we went. I took the package with us, so Chris could open it at my parents’ – she thought.
Picture this… I’m at the end of a table butting the wall.
Chris is to my left. To her left are my uncle, David, and
Matthew (my other son). To my right is my Mom, Dad, and
Christopher. We’re done eating… The package has been on the
table between Chris and me since we sat down. Mom asks if
we’re going back to their house for a few minutes, just as I
raise the box to Chris, as if to say, "open it now". Chris
says she’ll wait until we got to Dad and Mom’s. I said, "Ok…
Whenever." David (my uncle) said – I think -- something
about not going back there, so she said she’d open it there.
Christopher is smarting off about what type of ring it is.
Chris gets it open, looks at it for a second, then hands it
over for my mother to look at. She hands it to Dad… I’m
sweating bullets that someone will ask what that tape is in
the top, but no one has seen it, yet – They’re looking at
the ring. Christopher is next – Oh, God… he’s going to say
something – But he doesn’t. It doesn’t even look like he saw
the tape (he says he did, but thought it was tissue paper).
Matthew now. He looks at the ring… Looks at the box… DAMN!
He’s going to say something… He doesn’t. (He said he saw the
birthday ring, and thought, "There’s the birthday ring"…
Then saw the one in the top, and thought, "Oh… There’s the
engagement ring", and immediately passed it on.) David looks
at it, and hands it back to Chris. She pulls the birthday
ring out, wondering why they left the price-tag on it. She
reads the "Happy Birthday" side, and turns it over… and
can’t read it (I told you my hands are big, the sliver I
wrote on was small, and the pen kinda spread the ink. She
makes out "Under", but can’t make out the last word. She
stares at it for a few minutes trying to make it out, but
can’t. I ask her what it COULD be. She thinks for a minute,
and picks up the box, spotting the tape… Then the ring under
it… She gasps… She says, "Oh, my God…"… She pulls the ring
out… Reads the "over" side… Turns it over… (Christopher said
he had been talking to his brother, and turned to see what
was going on … saw everyone looking at Chris … She was
turning red, and he thought, "She’s choking", and couldn’t
figure out why everyone else was looking at her, but not
seeing that she was choking.) … and reads (without problem,
this time!
) "Will you marry me?" She’s in shock! She
looks like she wants to cry and laugh at the same time.
Finally, she catches her breath and says, "Yes" to me.
For the rest of the evening, I was grinning like a Cheshire Cat … snickering at her when I thought about how thoroughly I had surprised her… and that she had said, "Yes" ... And, every time she caught me looking at her, she "burst out" with a grin and snicker, herself.
She says it’s the "bestest birthday ever"!
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by Bill Sanders © October 29, 2002 - email:
BTW: For those that don't know:
- Christopher is my son. He was 19 that year, living with us, and working at Wal-Mart.
- Matthew is my other son. He was 17 that year, living with my parents in Lafayette, and starting at Purdue.
- I think everyone else is obvious.
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